Friday, March 28, 2008


Cancer (6/22-7/22)You need to restore balance in your social life. How you relax has got to change.

So what should I do tonight? I guess sitting home doing homework is probably not the best idea. Maybe I'll join Tippi and Tori at the bowling alley and hang out with all of the gays...but I really should be doing homework. Such a dilemma.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

I don't have an accent!

What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Inland North

You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop."

The Midland
The Northeast
The South
North Central
The West
What American accent do you have?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz


So I like to check my horoscope on a semi-regular basis just to see what it says. And I was surprised at what mine said today...Cancer (6/22-7/22)The emotional intensity and upheaval you've been feeling is getting stronger now.
Does that mean I am getting stronger? Or that the feelings are going to get stronger?
I hope it is that I am getting stronger, because I feel like I am. Hallelujah!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Life in boxes

My life is slowly getting packed in boxes...lots of them.
It makes me sad to think about what these boxes contain, what they mean to me and what the once meant to both of us.
As I look at old photographs of when we were first married, I see it now. How young he different he was. He doesn't even look like the same person, but I love him just the same, even if he broke my heart. That's just how I am, forgiving to a fault to those that I love and unforgiving to those who I don't.
As I pack up each box, I think about what lies ahead for me and right now as bleak as it seems, I do see light at the end of the tunnel. I see a flicker of what might be for me. I see the house with the beautiful garden and a swingset. I see a man who kisses my belly and talks to our unborn child. I see me being happy, in love, working as a nurse and enjoying life to its fullest everyday.
I think about these boxes, that will wait in storage for me. For my new life to begin...a year from now. When I walk across the stage at graduation and stay to myself "I MADE IT". And think to myself...I did without him. I did it with all of the great help from my friends and family. I did it by myself.
The one thing that these boxes do make me realize though right now is...I have a lot of things. Things that weigh me down, but I just can't throw them away, not just yet. They give me comfort, they give me hope and they give me strength. Most of all, they will be put away. Shelved in storage, where I won't have to think about them. I will only have what I need and I will hopefully have a clear head.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Lost and found

Well it seems like my life is spinning out of control these days. I have the weight of what feels like world on my shoulders, please give me anymore, I don't think I can handle another ounce!
Here is an update for all of you. Last week my husband left and said that he needed some space. I was torn apart, what horrible timing in my life. I felt like I could barely move. Let's see how much stress Amy can possibly handle? Like full time nursing school and two jobs isn't enough.
Now my brain is buzzing, when is gonna come back home?
Well he did come back home yesterday...but it was only for a moment. And its game over...I lose. I lose everything. He wants a divorce. He feels like he is holding me back and that he just can't do this anymore.
I can't afford to stay in the house, but I have no where I can really go. I can't afford my own place, I have too much stuff to comfortably stay anywhere that has offered and I hate relying on other people for too much.
My BFF Cori offered me room at her house and also offer me the ability to store whatever I want in her basement...I have so much stuff, it isn't even funny. I really don't think she even has the slightest idea of how much is really is. After being married for 5 years and living on your own for a little while before that, you tend to accumulate things, lots of things. Or at least I do. I am attached to things as well, which makes it so hard to get rid of them. I love her to death for being so supportive, but I feel bad about wanting to take it too.
I'd love to stay with my folks (which is what may happen during the weekdays) but there really isn't much room for me there. My mom is a pack rat like me and the spare rooms are stuffed to the gills with stuff. Maybe the need for "stuff" is genetic. My great grandma had a ton of stuff when they cleaned out her house. My aunt I think is the queen of "stuff".
So I have packed up a few boxes of my "stuff" and its killing me. This is my house, my home, my place and I am sad. Smudge and I will make it, but it is going to be the hardest year of my life. There is so much pressure on me now to be successful with school, I almost can't handle it. Please please please pray for me or for whatever you can, I need all of the help and strength I can get in these next few months.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Its Bombtastic

So in cue from my scrappy friends, I too bought some letters and had a good time with them in Key West, here is what I have, enjoy:


So on our way down to Key West it was late...about 11 or so and my friend Tippi who was driving was like Jesus Christ, all loud. We were like, huh and then we saw it:
The larger than life stone Jesus. Yowsers I feel like such a sinner.